Saturday, August 28, 2010

what women want?

this article appeared a month ago in the daily mail
i have added my own comments because quite frankly i thought she was stupid

The 30 simple things women REALLY want (take note chaps)
By Laura Kemp
It's the million dollar question - what do women really want? In a new book, psychologist Paco Underhill examines this very topic. Here, one woman offers her own top wishes…
1. Fat-free versions of garlic bread, trifle and brie.
No, all of those without fat are tasteless—don’t eat them if you don’t want the fat
2. A kitchen worktop that's minus Sunday's gravy and shrivelled strips of some kind of vegetable (probably onion), which have become one with the surface and won't shift until the woman of the house administers the Brillo.
Clean up after yourself for heavens sake
3. Oh, and while we're at it, a microwave free of flecks of unidentifiable stuff which could possibly be blitzed curry or spag bol, though we're not betting on it.
See #2
Bliss: A long, hot bath and fat-free trifle are on our girl's wish-list wrong
4. Not to be asked 'Where's my wallet/glasses/car key?' every single morning by the other half.
Don’t have that problem
5. Holidays which give us the chance to read one piffling book - just one - without being interrupted with 'Where are my goggles, Mum?' every few minutes.
See #4
6. A bed with clean, ironed sheets, fluffed-up pillows and a crisp and luxurious duvet - changed regularly, and with assistance. The sooner men realise this, the sooner we will feel cherished, adored and appreciated, and therefore more likely to enjoy spending time in bed with them in the first place.
Ironed sheets? Good grief
7. A bikini which extends our leg-length, flattens our tummy, lifts our cleavage and makes us feel like Angelina Jolie (but without the six kids in tow).

Ok but the body has to be included with this
8. A reliable builder who mindreads, cleans up the dust afterwards, rinses his coffee cup, doesn't scratch his nethers while explaining the problem with the supporting wall, and just gets the job done on time.
I don’t care about this one
9. To have the very occasional wolf whistle. But only when we are in the mood.
I am always in the mood for a wolf whistle
10. A long, hot bath - and a private wee. That means no knocking at the bathroom door, no barging in while we lie there submerged. And not to be caught by our other halves and offspring quizzically extending the strange long hairs which appear on the backs of our thighs once we've passed 35.
This one is really bizzare
11. A home-cooked dinner when it's the man's turn to do supper, rather than a calorific takeaway, which invariably means we are still the ones who have to dish it up, clear it away and fumigate the bin afterwards.
Oh get over it – dinner is dinner
12. To be able to admire the snake hips and smooth skin of a younger man who serves us coffee without feeling guilty and without feeling mortified when we realise we used to babysit them 15 years ago.
That’s your problem honey
13. No tutting or arched eyebrows from male colleagues when we have to dash off from work to pick up a sick child. One day, it will be their child who needs a mother's urgent TLC.
Again - your problem.. my boss has always understood
14. We would love a conversation with our husbands. Competing with the latest man gadget - an iPhone or iPad - really gets on one's iChest.
- not married
15. Decent, entertaining drama on Saturday night telly, not a dreadful game show involving celebrities who we've only had the misfortune to have heard of because we were forced to read a dog-eared mag while we waited to see the dentist.
Change the channel or read a decent book – there are lots of them out there
16. Being considered 'damaged goods', post-reproduction, is very irritating. If we can appreciate our man's salt and pepper hair, laughter lines and a drooping chest, is it too much to hope they can learn to love ours, too?
Most men do - its all in the attitude
17. To take our car to the garage and know we won't be ripped off; to let the gas man in without being asked 'Is your husband here?'; and for it to be considered that we might, just might, bring in half the household income, if not more. Our wish is also to be spoken to eyeto- eye rather thaneye-to-breast.
Ok..this I agree with.. when it comes to cars. Buying, selling or repairing we are treated horribly
18. When a woman goes out for the day and leaves her husband in charge of the kids, she wants to return to children in bed, washing brought in off the line and put away, dishwasher emptied and the ice cream tub back in the freezer rather than melted to liquid.
Not married.. cant relate
19. A bathroom with dry, folded towels and a sink with no toothpaste blobs in it.
Clean up after yourself then
20. For our children to be obedient, loving and appreciative and to go to bed with a smile on their faces rather than howling at the injustice of their mothers. We've read 15 parenting books, for goodness sake. What more can we give?
I agree. However………..
21. Endearing and well-thought out surprises. Such as an empty laundry basket, a bottle of that Sauvignon Blanc we drank on honeymooon, possession of the TV remote for a whole evening, and a day to be spent exactly as we wish just once in a blue moon.
Again, not married.
22. To at least share the guilt of sticking kids in nursery when we return to work, rather than carry it all by ourselves. Why don't dads feel tortured about leaving at 7am and returning at 7pm without first sorting out who's eating what, who's got money for the bus, and has everyone's homework been done?
I cried the first time I had to leave my daughter with a stranger…
23. For testosterone-addled men not to drive up our backsides. It is specifically to irritate men like this that we drive at the exact speed limit all the way, braking hard every now and again to remind them who's in front, and positioning ourselves so they can't overtake whatsoever. Hah!
Move over and let them pass … geesh
24. A wardrobe to suit every occasion, rather than a pile not just of last season's clothes, but last decade's, which make us feel dull as dishwater - which by the way, we had our hands in just before we went out on the town.
Well.. buy it then
25. A night off from feeding the cat, walking the dog, sprinkling pellets into the fishtank and chopping lettuce for the rabbit. Family pets should be cared for by the whole family, not just the female of the species.
Only child ..
26. Meaningful, loving sex, preceded and followed by candlelight, conversation, cuddles and kisses. Or a quickie if we've got to get up earlier than usual.
Not married…
27. To have our own personal assistant on call 24-7, who works for nothing. This is what men call 'a wife'.
Since I am not married can I call it a husband? Or a friend with benefits?
28. The father of our children to entertain them without resorting to a glory run at the toy shop - which we specifically banned because we're trying to teach them the value of saving their pocket money.
NM
29. For love to forever remain blind when we are in our pyjamas, wearing specs minus make-up, with talc on our roots and depilatory cream on on our upper lips.
NM
30. A man with the manners of Colin Firth, the brawn of Russell Crowe and the money of Simon Cowell. Well, a girl can dream, can't she?
Ewan McGregror

1 comment:

Minicapt said...

Re #4
Quit moving them around to see if he'll notice.

Women ...

Cheers